This is an oldie but a goodie… thanks to my man in Dallas Larry Lentz for reminding me of it!
Tech Support: "Sir, something has burned within your power supply."
Customer: "I bet that there is some command that I can put into the AUTOEXEC.BAT that will take care of this."
Tech Support: "There is nothing that software can do to help you with this problem."
Customer: "I know that there is something that I can put in…some command…maybe it should go into the CONFIG.SYS."
Tech Support: "Ok, I am not supposed to tell anyone this but there is a hidden command in some versions of DOS that you can use. I want you to edit your AUTOEXEC.BAT and add the last line as C:\DOS\NOSMOKE.EXE and reboot your computer."
Customer: "It is still smoking."
Tech Support: "I guess you'll need to call Microsoft and ask them for a patch for the NOSMOKE.EXE."
Four hours later, he calls back.
Tech Support: "Hello sir, how is your computer?"
Customer: "I called Microsoft and they said that my power supply is incompatible with their NOSMOKE.EXE and that I need to get a new one. I was wondering when I can have that done?"