Home » Uncategorized

Category Archives: Uncategorized

Applying Hockey Rules to Elections…

In hockey, before a face-off, if the two players can’t settle down and play nice the referee kicks them both out of the circle and the teams have to send two different players to start the play again.

Who thinks it would be a good idea for someone to tell Hillary and Donald to skate out so the two parties can replace them with new players to play nice? 

With the American Elections Coming…

For all Americans who say they will move to Canada if one or the other jackass wins the election: 

1) The War of 1812 we kicked your asses. 

2) You had better be prepared to know and understand our geography. 

3) Learn Metric. 

4) it is important for the gorgeous women to understand that in Canada middle-aged fat guys who are not wealthy are considered absolutely hot so if you want to fit in you had better come after us with both nipples blazing. 

5) It is important for the wealthy men to understand that in Canada we believe in helping others so you will be required to support the middle aged fat guys throughout their relationships with he hot young ladies. 

6) Colour is spelled with a U. So is Favour, Flavour, and Endeavour. Get used to it, we are right and you are wrong. 

7) Any positive references to Honey Booboo and anyone similar will be cause for immediate expulsion with no appeals process. 

8) Leave your guns behind… Unless you want to hunt, then bring a single shot gun; in Canada we don’t need seventy assault rifles and handguns to hunt an unarmed deer. 

9) Hockey is better than football, and by the way some of us call soccer football, and if you don’t like it then stay home. 

10) You are either allowed to complain about the heat in he summer or the cold in the winter; never both. 

11) All of the American hockey teams that have won Stanley Cups in the last 23 years have been replete with Canadians (replete means there were lots of them). So stop trying to brag that the US has won them. 

12) It is not only suggested, rather it is obligatory to have friends on both sides of the political spectrum, and it is a requirement to treat them all with respect … Even when you disagree with them.

13) Our comedians are funnier than yours, and we are accepting of most everyone… Except rude people, so don’t be rude!

14) We are just as patriotic as you are… We just don’t think it necessary to choke everyone on it. On that note, we are generally not in-your-face like you are… So stop that.

15) Our beer is better than yours. Always.

16) If you are a huge fan of a particular American micro-brew that you think might be better than Canadian beer, please refer to Rule 15.

17) Yes our taxes are higher. It is the cost we pay for people not dying because they can’t afford health care.

18) You will hear most Canadians complain about our healthcare and roads and politics and schools and and and… Before you chime in please remember: We didn’t elect anyone so objectionable that people are moving out of the country.  So shaddap!

19) We are pretty open minded here… Leave your pre-conceived notions and bible-thumping behind.

20) We like Cuba and Cubans… Maybe better than we like America and Americans. Live with it… They are nice people and you shouldn’t ostracize an entire country for 50 years because they prevented you from invading them.

There’s more to it, but this is a good start. Memorize this and follow the rules and you will get along just fine.

Single Sign-On Woes

I love the idea of Single Sign-On.  The fact that I can use a single set of credentials when I log on to my laptop, and then not have to keep entering passwords for subsequent actions, is in theory a great idea.

However there are four ‘great ideas’ that, when combined (as they so often are) lead to a big pain in my neck.  Those are:

  • Single Sign-On
  • Password PINs
  • Ticket-Checking Tickets (such as Kerberos, Active Directory, etc…)
  • Periodic password changing

I know why we have to change our passwords, and I am glad to do it… but when you do, and especially when you are working remote, it leads to all sorts of headaches.  Does anyone have a really good solution that will let me, in the middle of my session. change my password and continue working… without having to reset, refresh, log-off, re-enter?

I am open to ideas…

Why I Need to Be Escalated…

I got a message from a faithful reader yesterday pointing out in rather interesting terms that I have not been posting as much as I should.  Sorry about that! –MDG

Recently I noticed that a ticketing system that my client uses was taking an unusually long time to apply updates.  Every month it would take as long as three or four days to apply the regular updates.  This was a problem for many reasons, not the least of which was that company policy stated that patch management should be performed during off-hours, and there are precious few four-day stretches when the company was completely closed.

I complained to the company (which I shall not name) and they told me that this was not normal behaviour.  I rather figured that out on my own, but I am glad he agreed with me.  He asked me to connect to a remote support session from the application server, which I did.  We sat and watched the patches applying normally… and by normally, I mean that the ten minute session showed no anomalies.  It did not seem relevant to the second-level support tech that this was Tuesday afternoon, and the patch process had started Friday evening.

I decided to very calmly waste his time.  After all, patch-management of this system seemed to be close to a full-time gig for me.  We chatted for 15 minutes.  It wasn’t so much that we chatted as it was me telling him that we were looking at the problem from two different perspectives – he did not see a need to escalate the case, and I did.  While he kept telling me that unless there was a noticeable crash he could not escalate it.  I asked him while he was in my system to look at the log files… he wasn’t quite sure where they were.  Who was wasting whose time exactly?

As we chatted and the patches seemed to move ahead, the Updater crashed right in front of us.  His words were: ‘Oh, now that I have seen it crash I can escalate this case to our engineering team.’

This was 35 minutes into our call.  Had he escalated me 25 minutes earlier I probably would have been appreciative of his help.  But as it stands I am just really turned off by this company.

Work from Anywhere: The gold standard PPO

There are days when I love being a blogger.  A few days after I published my recent article on the ChargeTech ThinCharge case for the iPhone 6, I got an e-mail from the company telling me that they wanted me to try another one of their products, the Portable Power Outlet.  They shipped it off to me to give it a spin.

For the past few years I have been relying on a portable USB charger to keep my phone alive.  The last one I picked up a year ago was a 20,000 milliamp device that had two USB ports in case I had two phones.  It was a fine enough device, but it was heavy for what it was… and of course not every device is going to charge through its USB port.

When the ChargeTech Portable Power Outlet arrived a few days later I was a bit reluctant… while it was not significantly heavier than the old portable charger I had been using (25oz), it was much larger (7.5” x 5.25” x 1”), or about the size of my Kobo eBook reader.  It came packaged with a travel pouch (a nice touch but unnecessary), an AC power adapter, and an international adapter.  Very nice, especially for those of us who travel a lot.  The fact that it cannot charge via USB is a bit of a letdown, but understandable considering its power capacity.

Otto von Bismarck is quoted as saying “The biggest lies are told before the marriage, after the hunt, and during the election.”  It is a good quote to live by, but seeing as he was a Prussian before the unification of Germany, the quote obviously could not take into account the lies told about the battery life of tablet PCs, and so it is that I know that my Microsoft Surface Pro 4, which promises up to 9 hours of battery life, will seldom last the morning, let alone a full day of working when it is not plugged in.

Mitch’s Use Case #1

It is all well and good to say that one is going to work from a park bench on a beautiful day, but how realistic is that when we don’t have enough power to get from nine to five?  With the meteorologist predicting an absolutely gorgeous Canada Day Friday (July 1st), I was excited by the prospect… especially since as a remote worker for an American company I did not have to sit in a particular office.  I may not have the day off (I have Monday, July 4th off for the U.S. Independence Day), but I could at least be out enjoying the weather… as long as I could depend on my battery not giving out.

ChargeTech 1

Because I am still in the onboarding phase with my new company, I plan to spend Friday watching training videos.  This means I do not have to be chained to a desk… as long as I have enough power to get through the day, and a stable Internet connection.

So here’s how I plan to do it.  It is not just a theory… this worked for me last week, so I know it will work.

  1. I will charge my Microsoft Surface Pro 4 battery completely Thursday evening, so that I can start with a full charge.
  2. I will bring my HP Pro Tablet 408 (which has a GSM chip and a data plan) which will serve as my Internet hub.  As with the larger device, I will make sure to charge it overnight so it also starts with a full charge,
  3. For the morning I will use both of these on their stored battery power; however when the power warnings come on (which I predict will be around 12:30pm for the Surface Pro and 3:30pm for the HP Pro Tablet) I will plug each of these devices into my ChargeTech Portable Power Outlet – but only long enough for their batteries to recharge completely.  That way I will be able to continue using both devices until (and beyond) 5pm, when I can call it a day.

Let me tell you something, there is nothing better than being able to work from the park – say, the boardwalk along the lakeshore in Burlington – on a nice summer day.  Knowing that the vast majority of my work will consist of watching videos, I will bring along a cigar or two, just because I can.  I will pack a picnic lunch, so I can prove how hard I am really working by not even taking time off for lunch.  I will be able to devote my full and undivided attention to my work.

ChargeTech 2

Ok, who am I kidding… my attention will be slightly divided by the view, my cigars, and the glorious weather… none of which will detract from my ability to learn what I need to learn Smile

Mitch’s Use Case #2

I have to drive to Montreal for a wedding on Monday.  No problem, as I said I have Monday off.  I can celebrate with my friend Ron and his bride, and dance into the night.

I do not have Tuesday off.  Drat.

Okay, have to drive back from Montreal, which any way you slice it will be a six hour drive.  I have a few of choices:

  1. Work the whole day Tuesday from Montreal, and then drive home after 5pm, getting me home closer to midnight than not;
  2. Work a half day from Montreal, then drive home from 1pm, taking whatever meetings I need to take from the car on my iPhone.  I would only be able to bill for a couple of hours rather than the day; or
  3. Find a way to work from the car, which includes listening to my onboarding videos and taking my conference calls as needed.

I want to be clear, if I had to watch the videos the third option would not be an option.  I like to be a safe driver, and that precludes watching anything but the road.  However since I only have to listen, it is the same as a book on tape (CD).  I can listen as I drive, and pull over as needed to take the quizzes.

Of course, this leaves me with the same predicament I had before; however by connecting my Surface Pro 4 and my HP Pro Tab 408 to the Portable Power Outlet, I will be able to listen for the entire 600km journey!

So… let’s look at how the Portable Power Outlet’s features absolutely rock:

  • Two USB ports allow you to charge multiple devices (say, tablet and phone) simultaneously.
  • 3-prong AC power outlet allows you to charge any device (up to 85W) at the same time.
  • While specially designed for computers, the PPO will actually power any device – like a heater or lamp or toaster – just like any power outlet.  It is like walking around with a wall outlet in your laptop bag!
  • The Portable Power Outlet is the lightest and slimmest 27,000mAh device on the market – no competitive product comes close!
  • Scratch-resistant, fingerprint-proof case.

While the device does come for a price that might make you think twice (USD$250 retail), it is currently available marked-down for only $185… a real incentive to pick it up while it is on sale from www.chargetech.com.

So yes, this is my second thumbs-up review for a ChargeTech product.  What can I say?  Good companies will consistently make good products!

I’m Back!

As many of you know I left Microsoft to pursue other adventures when I did my first gig with Rakuten in the fall of 2013.  The plan was, according to the managers I spoke with, for me to return to Microsoft when I got back from Japan.

That obviously did not happen.

I will not go into any detail about what or why or when… but the last three years have been interesting… while I retained my MCT credentials and continued working with Microsoft technologies, my affiliation with the organization became strained.  I was pretty sure that my days of working with them were behind me.

There is a quote from a novel from one of my favourite authors: The present is like the past and the past is the present, heya?  The last word might give away that the book was Noble House by the late, great James Clavell.  And so it is that after several months of discussions and background checks and much more, this morning I walked back into the offices of Microsoft Canada to pick up my new badge.  I am a vendor this time around, as opposed to a business guest which is what I was previously.  What does that mean?  I guess it doesn’t matter.  I’m back.

While my role will not be community focused as it once was, I will nevertheless be blogging about technologies that I use and work with.

Thanks to all of you who were concerned and interested… and no, I assure you I will not be drinking or serving any Kool-Aid this time around!

Keep it in Your Pocket…

Here’s a tip for travelers going through Airport Security: you are going  babe asked to empty your pockets … Everything, including wallet and car keys and passport. It all has to go in one of those plastic bins. Lots of coins? Put em in da bin. Matches? Bin em.

You also have to take off your jacket.

If you want to make your life a lot easier (not to mention faster for the people in line behind you): As you make your way to the front of the line, transfer everything from your pants pockets to the pockets of your jacket. That way when you get through you can quickly grab the jacket and go… And transfer everything back at your leisure.  It’s faster and easier for everyone involved.

Don’t have a jacket? Fine… Use a plastic (or paper) bag to achieve the same results.

Good luck and fly safe!

%d bloggers like this: